The Power of Emotional Men
Young boys have been taught not to show emotions; that this is weakness or a feminine thing to do. So they become insensitive, or overly stoic, attempting to act “tough” even when they’re in a strictly social environment.
This is far from the truth however, and is a cover for the real problem. Expressing emotions is never weak, it is the emotions themselves that show a weak side. So when someone expresses these sensitive emotions, they are exposed as frail and unsure. But instead of pushing outside their comfort zone, too develop strength and seasoning as men, they choose instead to conceal these emotions, never dealing with them, never growing.
In reality, the stronger a man is, the more sure of himself he is, the more relaxed he is in his social environment, the more emotionally expressive he will be. Emotional expressiveness is not a sign of femininity, but one of comfort with yourself, and a relaxed urge to express who you are. Someone who is stifled in expressiing emotion, is actually weak. Anyone who is powerful, who leads and influences, expresses themselves emotionally. In fact, the only way to influence with words is to communicate them through emotion.
Communication is 93% nonverbal. When a person stifles their emotional expressiveness, they remove most of their ability to communicate.
At a certain point in their lives, men develop a certain gravity to their presence, a certain stoicism. Sometimes referred to as the strong and silent type. But this isn’t faked, and people, especially women can spot the incongruencies in young men trying to act “hard” in a social environment. Men develop this from life seasoning, from having taken responsibility for everything in their life, working hard to develop it, and giving no one else the responsibility of making sure things in their life are worked out. So he deals with life issues with calm and reserve, knowing that everything in his life he’s handled well and will full purpose and intent. But it’s not always like this, he knows when to have fun, because otherwise what is the point to life? And he knows the others in his life that look to him for guidance because of his strength, need his emotional perspective, so he becomes positive and fun.
After 17 years of martial arts and mixed martial arts experience, and a career as a military officer, I realize that the best thing for those around me is for me to lead them into a healthier and more positive emotional and mental state. I’m not attempting to act tough to show people how alpha I am. This makes no sense this is negative and a social downer. This shift between stoicism and proactive positivity is natural to the environment he finds himself in. Most underdeveloped men go too far into one extreme or the other, attempting to act tough in inopportune times, or needy and approval-seeking. People, especially women, spot the small incongruencies in behavior of a person who does not have the natural rhythm and flow correct.
